Life...

You know that saying, "Life goes on."? Well I truely believe in it. After my dad passed away, I went on with my life. That's not to say that I don't think about him daily or find things difficult (father/daughter dances at weddings) but I live my life. I believe and making sure each day was worth living. My life motto is hard to live up to come January until about June. For those that don't know... before my dad passed away in May of 2009, he was hospitalized and put on a respirator in January and stayed that way until he passed away. There were some moments where we had no hope because he was so sedated and unaware of anything and there were some moments where we had high hopes because he was awake and trying to communicate. Many people don't know this but the last time I heard my dad's voice was Dec. 30, 2008, and trust me that is one of the hardest things I have experienced. You never realize how hard it is to remember the way a person's voice sounds until it's gone. While he was fighting for his life, I was 4 1/2 hours away student teaching. The feelings of stress, worry, and guilt still stick with me today. This year seems to be easier than last year, and I think it is because of my job. The mornings where I'm drying my tear filled eyes, I'm reminded of how much work and energy I put into getting my own classroom, and how proud my dad would be. Having 22 lively kindergartners also reminds me how lucky I am to be right where I was meant to be. So I will just push through the rough days and remember life is not easy but there is always something to be grateful about.